In the end I had no choice. On his birthday, three months after I'd stopped seeing him he literally nearly ran me over as I crossed at the lights and when I stopped to talk to him, my heart stopped with me.
All the pain and mess and rubbish that we've had to deal with and yet, there was still an undeniable pull. Neither of us unable to let go of. Slowly, slowly we began to assess the damage. Look to the future.
Could we handle the situation? Our Ex's getting married next month? Was it too embarrassing to find ourselves inadvertently part of a wife swap? Did we really care? How could we manage the children?
Anyway. It's now been a few months of just pure love and happiness and passion. It's unlikely to last at that level. We'll both be dead within the year. Will need to calm down. Will need to stop eating and drinking!
I have got my "BBBBB" - Builder Bloke Beer Belly Back which he loves. I spend months trying to lose it and the minute he is back he spends weeks encouraging it back. He loves all that girly squishy belly skin - says it's the new look = Britney, Christina - it's all the rage. In fact he says it's the sign of motherhood and we should all be proud of it. Well. It makes me feel better about it anyway.